The Dynamic Duo

I know this is hard to believe, but I’m actually going to write, mostly, about stuff that happened quite recently; yesterday in fact.
UltraDad, Murphy, Rowdy and I did, indeed, have an adventure. But first we stopped by Pat’s house to see her new ‘pets.’ Now, Beaker’s Parents, don’t be jealous, but Pat now has 6 turtles in a 50 gallon aquarium! I don’t remember what kind they are, but they are not totally aquatic, like our pig-nosed friend. There are rocks only partially submerged so they can climb out of the water if they’ve a mind to, which they often do. Two of them are about CD Disk- sized, while the four little ones are…think half dollar. Anyway, they’re pretty cool, but, as I told Pat, I’m too lazy to wish I had some of my own. All I can think of is the work involved. Sadly, several days later, the biggest one “passed on”.
Okay, I’m going to back up a bit, to Jim’s visit, actually, and we are going back to prison for a bit. One thing I really wanted to do when Jim was home was show him the place where I work. I just wanted him to get an idea of how it is and meet some of the people I work with. We have a new LT in camp, actually he is the LT who was at Calvin Camp when I first started working there, and is now back. So far, he has been very nice and supportive of the store, which I greatly appreciate. So, my first step in gaining Jimbo’s admittance to the ‘big house’ was to email the LT to request permission. His reply? “I have to ask the Warden in Cedar. “ I’ll spare you all the details, except to say that I was persistent, and called back several times, finally getting the okay. So, Friday morning Sgt Donald told me to go ahead and bring the kid over. “Just make sure he’s not wearing blue jeans,” the Sgt warned me, “We want to be able to tell him apart from our ‘customers.’ Good idea.
The upshot was that Jim (and incidentally me) got a very nice personalized tour of the facilities by Sgt Donald, and the “customers” got to see my very tall, handsome son. I guess the comments kind of went something like this: “THAT is Ms. Kathy’s son? He’s so tall, and she’s such a little thing.” I got to see parts of the camp I don’t often see, and hear things I didn’t know, such as: 1) because of the prison shortage in the state as a whole, we will be increasing camp capacity by about 30 inmates, 2) The officers recently discovered an area where inmates had been climbing over the fence during visiting hours to remove contraband left for them by said visitors, either in their unlocked cars, or hidden somewhere on the premises. The wire (not barbed) was pretty sagged down in that area, which is kind of hidden from ready-view, 3) An effort is made not to send rival gang members to the same camp facility to avoid violence. It was especially nice for me to get to show Jim my store, and introduce him to my inmate clerks: Ricky and Brain. They are two of the best and most trustworthy clerks I have ever had, and definitely make my job more enjoyable.
Well, now that we are back in prison, I am having a talk with some of the guys about a little problem I have. When UltraDad and I have a day off together, we can’t think of anything to do that would be fun for both of us. We would both like to go exploring and see new sights that are not crowded with people, but he is convinced that this is impossible without a 4-wheel drive pickup, which we do not possess. Brain fetches ‘Bugsy’, a 21 or so yr old inmate who grew up in the area and knows it well. He tells an alluring tale of a Hot Springs, accessible by 2-wheel drive, and only a couple of hours away. And the best part? There is never anyone there! Bugsy draws a map, taking into account my direction-challenged-syndrome, or DCS. “You can’t miss it,” he assures me. “You won’t be able to see it until you are right there, but you should smell the sulphur ahead of time. There is one big pool with an old rusted BBQ pit next to it, and lots of smaller ones. Be careful of the smaller pools; some of them are REALLY hot!”
I am excited beyond measure at the thought of surprising Udad with such an awesome place to go. Maybe I will just throw him into the car, drive on out there.
Of course I can’t help myself, and end up telling him the whole story and showing him my map at the first opportunity. But he is game, though a tiny bit skeptical. After all, HE has never heard of these alleged Hot Springs, so could they really exist?
Saturday morning we load up Murphy and Rowdy, stop by the grocery store for some fried chicken and drinks, and head out. It is a beautiful day, and the drive, as promised, is scenic, if a bit windy. Quite suddenly after 50-60 miles, the nice paved road turns into roughened dirt, but nothing my car can’t handle. Just have to slow down a bit. We make all the turns, ending with a right turn to ‘follow the fence line.’ Now the road is considerably worse. Deep ruts line the road, sometimes filled with muddy water from a recent rain. My average speed is now @10 mph, and even that seems too fast. UltraDad is now complaining about my driving: “You will have to drive on one side or the other. If you drive in the ruts, you are going to high center us!” and “Don’t drive over that shadscale, or you will give us a flat tire.” My reaction? “I think it’s your turn to drive.”
We stopped at a wide place in the “road” and Udad has another idea. “Let’s just walk a little bit and see what we can see.”
Now, for some time, we had been watching a pickup and people on a distant hillside. It looked like the road was going to lead us right to them. It seemed a shame to have come all this way and not even know if the Hot Springs really were there or not, so we kept walking. Finally we came to a fork in the road, so we took the high road (you take the low road) where we could overlook the pickup and people and even the Hot Springs, if they did indeed exist. They did indeed, along with numerous smaller ones, some of them quite warm. The whole area was very boggy, and soon our shoes were encrusted with mud. It did no good to try and avoid the mud, though walking on vegetation helped a little. It would look like the ground a few yards over was dryer and packed, but when you went over there, it would prove to be an illusion. Finally we mudded our way over to the big hot pool where a family was swimming and picnicking. There was a Mom, a Dad, a big brother and two little sisters. We exchanged polite greetings. As it turns out, this was their first trip out here also. And they weren’t too sure about the swimming. The two little girls had been in the water, and were now covered in little red, itchy spots. “Duck mites, I think,” declared the Dad. “And they are bad news.”
If we had found the place isolated, I may have been tempted to experience the warm water myself, so perhaps I was saved by this not-entirely-welcome company. Not wanting to intrude upon their family time, we soon left and made our way back to the car. Somehow, it seemed to take twice as long to walk back as it had to get there. UltraDad, fortunately, had some candy in his pocket to guard against shakiness. Murphy and Rowdy had to be forcibly stopped from drinking from the muddy puddles. When we got back to the car, and I filled their dish, they drank, and drank, and drank.
I was feeling quite cheerful and vindicated at actually finding the place from my map, even if we didn’t get to stay and enjoy it for very long. UltraDad decided we should get a bit further down the road before stopping for lunch, so off we went. “Let’s go back another way,” he suggested. “Turn right here, towards the Fish Hatchery and we’ll go back through Secret Pass.” That sounded like fun.
“We could stop for lunch when you find a wide spot in the road. I think they probably have picnic tables at the fish hatchery.” UltraDad said. I translated that to mean he wished to eat at the picnic tables near the fish hatchery, silly me. Suddenly there was an exasperated noise from the seat beside me. “You passed a whole bunch of good places to stop,” he exclaimed. “I thought you wanted to eat at the fish hatchery,” said I.
“No,” he said with exaggerated patience. “I just said there might be tables there.”
Fine. Within 5 minutes, we were parked enjoying our lunch.
We never did see the Fish Hatchery. It seems like we must have missed it, but I don’t know how we could have. In any case, it was another scenic drive, and, on the whole, a very enjoyable day.
In fact, I’m about ready to set out again. Anyone got another map?

UltraMom