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Long-time-no-see UltraMom here. Sorry I’ve been away so long; its not because I haven’t been thinking of you, really it isn’t. But since we’ve been down this road many times before, lets just cut the excuses and get on with the errant posting, shall we?
Lot’s of stuff is happening in world-UltraMom, or rather will be happening soon. Here’s a brief rundown on coming events: vacationing with UltraBob, UltraGirl, UltraLinc, (along with Ultra Dad and Heather) in Portland, Oregon, including a night in Newport (on the coast!) for UltraMom’s birthday. Immediately after that is the much anticipated event of the year; the wedding of Jimbo and Jessica in Boise, Idaho. And then, in late August, UltraMom begins her new school year in the AAS Nursing Program at Great Basin College! That’s right, kids, I made it into the program and have two ‘fun-filled’, ‘action-packed’ years ahead of me as I head towards a new career, and hopefully, increased earning power.
I have been working on some scholarship applications, and when I got to the section on “Personal Statement”, I naturally asked for help from the two scholarship whizzes in the family. Jimbo sent me some samples of his, which were meaty and well-written, extolling the wonders and benefits to the workplace in specific and to society as a whole of assisting him in becoming a certified Industrial Hygienist. The essays, along with a perfect GPA and sometime required photo submission has netted him over $10,000 in scholarship monies for next year. Good job, kiddo!
Johnny’s personal statement, which helped net him a very nice partial scholarship through three years of Vanderbilt Law School, was very entertaining and, to me, utterly charming. I think it’s only fair that since Johnny is the one who encouraged/shamed me into posting again, that he help me write the dang thing. And so, for your entertainment enlightenment, and general edification I hereby present Johnny’s great work of literature, titled (by me) “Why I want to go to Law School”. (Critique and comments to follow)

“Because I said so!” was the common response to my youthful inquiries regarding the rationale behind the seemingly arbitrary mandates imposed upon me by my parents.  To my credit, I both frequently and vociferously argued against this blanket justification and petitioned for my rights with all the tools at my youthful command.  But my early attempts at judicial persuasion seemed doomed to failure.  Attempts to introduce favorable decisions from alternate jurisdictions ("But Billy’s parents let HIM stay up until 10!") were habitually barred from consideration, with the issued reminder that such holdings lacked precedence in my home ("I don’t care what Billy’s mother and father let him do, he’s not living under my roof!").  Even plain and credible instances of jurisdictional stare decisis ("Well you let Bob watch Rambo, so why can’t I?") were summarily dismissed on supposedly key but plainly irrelevant factors such as comparative chronological advancement ("Because he is older than you!").  Having exhausted all available legal avenues of recourse in my quest for justice (there being no court of appeals), I occasionally felt compelled to practice acts of civil disobedience as extolled by John Locke.  Regrettably, these demonstrations were ineffective as catalysts of social change, and notable only for their brevity.  It seemed that no sooner had I commenced a daring raid on the family room, in direct defiance of the “bed time” ordinance, and I was already in custody and being sentenced to either banishment ("Go to your room!"), or worse, a humiliating public-shaming ("Go stand in the corner!").  Despite repeated failure I never ceased in my youthful struggles against injustice, and this has plainly crafted me into the ideal law school candidate.
All levity aside, I was not interested in law at an early age.  In fact, I believe that the only careers I ever even considered as a child were Movie Star/Astronaut and Rockstar/Doctor, but for unknown reasons neither of these has panned out.  When I began college I had only two criteria for my future vocation: 1) It had to interest and challenge me; and 2) It had to provide me with the opportunity to make a meaningful contribution to society.  My journey toward law school didn’t begin until the first semester of my sophomore year of college when I enrolled in Criminal Justice 101 and was introduced to the ethical dilemmas inherent in the application of law, via the assigned course-text The Brothel Boy.  This fictional book was written from the perspective of a relatively inexperienced British constabulary officer in colonial India charged with the responsibility of enacting and enforcing law within his allotted province, with only extremely belated and infrequent correspondence from his superiors.  Until I attempted to formulate my solutions to the suppositious dilemmas presented within that book, I had never given any serious consideration to the intrinsic difficulty in attempting to balance case-specific justice with the necessity to create the sound judicial principles necessary to inform future interpretation of law.  Though difficult, I found these challenges exhilarating, and by the end of the semester I had declared Criminal Justice as my major.
In subsequent courses, both within and outside my major, I continued to learn about law and the diverse areas of its impact.  In my Corrections Law class, I read Supreme Court decisions for cases concerning gross violations of human rights, such as Madrid v. Gomez, and learned the key roles that attorneys and judges played in remedying these abuses.  In Constitutional Law, I learned about such cases as Brown v. Board of Education in which the courts rectified injustice when the legislative branch of the government was either unable or unwilling to do so.  For my Senior Tutorial paper, I researched the in rem practice of civil asset forfeiture and found myself not only astounded at the concept of executing civil proceedings again property rather than the property owner, but also enthralled by the complex legal history of this practice.  Finally, in my course on The Legal Regulations of American Democracy, I was given a glimpse of the crucial and complex law involved in such areas as campaign finance and electoral districting.  I left this course with not only the absolute conviction that I never wanted to practice election law but also with a newfound respect for the role the legal profession has in protecting the integrity of the most vital process of American democracy- the vote.  I don’t mean to suggest that these courses provided me with a thorough knowledge of the law, but they did instill my desire to obtain one.
I realize that reading Supreme Court decisions and actually practicing law are two very different things, and with this in mind, I decided to get some real-world legal experience before making the serious commitment of enrolling in law school.  In the half-year since I secured a Project Assistant’s position at the firm of Holland & Hart LLP, I have had the opportunity to interact with practicing attorneys on a daily basis, and observe genres of legal practice that academia had not exposed me to.  Through these observations, I have come to appreciate the law’s indispensability to all aspects of commercial business operations, and ways in which civil advocacy can remedy injustice when the criminal system cannot (such as medical malpractice).
I am confident that I have found a career that meets both of the goals I established for myself when entering college, and eagerly await beginning my legal career.  I may, however, have to resign myself to the fact that even a superb legal education won’t enable me to win an argument against my parents.

The last statement is totally untrue; this kid can talk his way out of anything, and in lieu of sound argument and sound logic, can nearly always defeat me through repetition, circular reasoning and references to my faulty memory. I too eagerly await the beginning of his legal career, and I’m sure that by sometime in August, we will hear good news concerning his passage of the Idaho Bar. Thanks for helping me write my first post back. I’ll try to be around more, at least til I come up with a fresh batch of excuses.